Losing a child is one of the toughest experiences anyone can face. It shakes your world and brings a pain that's hard to describe. If you're going through this, it’s important to know you’re not alone and that healing is possible, even if it feels out of reach right now.
First, give yourself permission to grieve how you need to—there’s no right or wrong way. Some days you might feel overwhelmed, other days numb. These feelings are normal. Surround yourself with people who listen without judgment and can offer real support. It’s okay to speak openly about your loss and your feelings.
Support groups, whether in person or online, connect you with others who truly understand. Talking to people who’ve walked a similar path gives comfort and insight into what comes next. Professional grief counselors or therapists can also guide you step-by-step, helping you process intense emotions healthily.
Friends and family might want to help but sometimes don’t know how—don’t hesitate to tell them what you need, whether it’s a chat, a walk, or just some quiet company. Simple acts like sharing stories about your child keep their memory alive and create bonds during the healing journey.
Healing doesn't mean forgetting your child; it means learning to live with the loss without it controlling your life. Finding ways to honor your child’s memory, like planting a tree or creating a scrapbook, can offer comfort and a sense of peace.
Keep in mind, setbacks are part of healing. Anniversaries, birthdays, and holidays may hurt more than usual. Planning ahead for these moments supports your emotional safety. If things feel too heavy, reach out for professional help—grief counseling is a powerful tool for making sense of what's happened.
Remember, it’s okay to find moments of joy and hope. They don't diminish your love or memory—they are signs of resilience and strength.
Take the time you need, be gentle with yourself, and reach out when you’re ready. The road through loss is hard, but with support and patience, healing can happen.
DJ and sangoma Tumi 'Gogo Skhotheni' Motsoeneng and her estranged husband mourn their three-year-old son, Monde Jr Shange, who passed away due to significant health challenges. Born prematurely and spending most of his life in intensive care, Monde Jr faced an uphill battle. The couple, despite a troubled relationship, seeks privacy during this difficult time.
